Why ISPs Should Totally Rely on Google and CloudFlare for DNS (Wink)

Why ISPs Should Totally Rely on Google and CloudFlare for DNS (Wink)

Guest Post From Glenn Kelley at Connectivity Engineer

“Why ISPs Should Totally Rely on Google and CloudFlare for DNS (Wink, Wink)”

Alright, folks, gather round as we explore the hilariously absurd notion that Internet Service Providers (ISPs) should shirk their responsibility and just use free DNS servers like Google’s or CloudFlare’s. This is the same as suggesting that a professional chef should ditch all the fancy kitchen gadgets and just use a microwave, because, well, it’s just cooking, right? ?

1. Dependency is the new Independence!

Why would an ISP want to have any semblance of control over their core services? After all, why not put all your eggs in someone else’s basket? It’s a fun game! You’re not really an ISP until you’ve entirely surrendered one of your primary services to entities that have absolutely no obligation to prioritize your users.

2. Because third-party outages are SO fun!

Remember the joy of surprise holidays at school when there was an unexpected power outage? It’s the same thrill when Google or CloudFlare has an issue, and your entire subscriber base is unable to access the internet. Bonus points if it happens during a crucial time, like when everyone is trying to work from home!

3. Who needs customization anyway?

Why would ISPs want the ability to implement custom solutions or DNS filtering that suits their customer base? Standardized, one-size-fits-all solutions are definitely the future. Just like everyone looks great in a generic t-shirt, right?

4. Data privacy is so last season.

Let’s face it, who needs privacy when you can just hand over all your users’ browsing habits to large corporations? It’s not like these corporations benefit from collecting and analyzing vast amounts of data, right? Give them a break, they’re just collecting it for… fun?

5. Local support is overrated.

ISPs have had it all wrong! Rather than having local support and teams who understand the nuances of their infrastructure, it’s much better to rely on a monolithic entity. Because as we all know, navigating labyrinthine support channels and automated phone trees is everyone’s idea of a good time.

6. Who cares about latency?

Why should ISPs care if queries are routed across continents, when they could just set up local DNS servers? Speed and efficiency? Nah! Slow and steady won the race, remember the tortoise?

To wrap it up, if you’re an ISP and have no desire for control, customization, efficiency, or privacy, then by all means, ditch your DNS infrastructure and leave it to Google and CloudFlare. For the rest of us in the reality-based community, there’s a lot more to consider when it comes to running a successful ISP.

P.S. The sarcasm was strong with this one. But remember, always make informed decisions and respect different opinions, even if they seem a tad unorthodox! 

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